Top-10 Disappointing Movies of 2016


poster-tmnt-out-of-the-shadows10. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows

I know, I know, I’m too old for this movie, it isn’t made for me. But never the less, this was a disappointing sequel. I enjoyed the first film for what it was. It felt reminiscent to the original cartoon from what I remembered, and for being overloaded with Megan Fox as April O’Neil, I still found some fun in it.

This sequel boasted the additions of Bebop and Rocksteady, Krang and Casey Jones, yet this film was still a total bummer. The additions of these characters felt rushed, Krang was a virtual cameo and this movie was pretty much a copy of itself. There was so much shoehorned into this story-line yet it still didn’t come off as feeling like anything different than “The Amazing Spider-Man 2” all over again.

poster-mechanic-resurrection9. Mechanic: Resurrection

Ok so how high of expectations can you really have for a Jason Statham movie? I know, I get it. But I actually enjoyed the first “Mechanic” film, it was much better than I was expecting it to be and thought the story and the performances from Statham and Ben Foster carried the film along.

This sequel was the pure definition of a cash-grab sequel. If Statham jumping from a cable car, onto a hang-glider in the opening scene doesn’t give away the tone, the second slapped in fight sequence in front of a cheap CGI backdrop, certainly will. This film tried nothing new, was laced with terrible performances, and so much cheese on the action, that you will need a lactose pill after watching. There were some fun moments here and there, but overall it was a joke of a sequel.

poster-the-darkness8. The Darkness

Normally I wouldn’t be at all excited to see a film like this. They are rarely good, often generic, and usually simple copies of other films from the genre. But people always say everything is better with a side of ‘bacon’. I was hoping Kevin Bacon and Radha Mitchell could carry this film along and possibly make it a surprisingly enjoyable film.

Well I was wrong; Radha Mitchell gives her best effort, Kevin Bacon does well when he is actually in the movie. But this one showed no ambition, or sense of how to utilize its cast. This was a run of the mill genre film that goes through all the motions and falls on side characters to fill the bulk of the scenes and it was instantly forgettable.

poster-jack-reacher-27. Jack Reacher: Never Go Back

I think I enjoyed the first “Jack Reacher” more than most. I found it to be a surprisingly layered story-line that wove a solid crime mystery with Tom Cruise shining in the lead role of military investigator Jack Reacher. So, I was excited to see there was a sequel coming out, with Cruise reprising his role, and a couple trailers that boasted some solid action.

But what a disappointment this film turned out to be. That persona of the character was almost completely different from the first. The story-line was like a first draft of an, even when finished (C+) script and it was shockingly lacking in quality and entertainment. Somethings just give us natural expectations. Martin Scorsese is directing it… it should be good. Seth Rogen is in the lead… it should have raunchy humor. Tom Cruise is in the lead… it should deliver a certain level of quality. But not this time, this film was a disappointment and a perfect example of a B-movie, with Cruise in the lead.

poster-jason-bourne6. Jason Bourne

Despite being number-six on the list, this could be the film that pained me the most. This was my number-one anticipated film of the summer and in the end, was a total let down. Matt Damon was back, Paul Greengrass was back directing, this film was going to be amazing. Then, Greengrass decided to piss all over it with a glaring over-use of his trademark hand-held camera techniques.

There were some very good moments in this movie, but the story was not on the level of the other films. It felt lacking in the performances, and once again Greengrass just litters his film-style all over this movie from start-to-finish. There was motion in every damn scene and even when a character would be walking out of the room the camera would be moving.

There were some excellent action sequences in this movie that were horribly edited and in the end not fun to watch. I had such high expectations for this film, and in the end, it was common in theme, routine in its progression, and harder on the eyes than a “Star Wars” marathon in 3D would be.

poster-x-men-apocalypse5. X-Men: Apocalypse

I may be one of the few starting to get “X-Men” fatigue. I have enjoyed all the films in this Fassbender/McAvoy led series but they have been getting monotonous. Both Fassbender and McAvoy are excellent in their performances but the whole routine is starting to tire for me. Their characters seem to be in a ‘Groundhog Day’ status and listening to McAvoy’s emotional wisdom as Xavier, or Fassbender’s teary eyed torment as Magneto, is just starting to feel stale to me.

Then, in comes “X-Men: Apocalypse” the enemy of all enemies who turned out to be just another enemy that would generate some spectacularly routine special-effects filled sequences. I was in hopes for a solid antagonist to create some intrigue in a story, and this film was just another “X-Men” film that was lacking some Jackman charm in a major way.

poster-batman-v-superman4. Batman V. Superman: Dawn of Justice

I will admit BvS was not a horrible movie. The ‘Ultimate Edition’ did fix some flaws in my opinion. But with years of development, a year-long delay, and endless amounts of promoting, the ultimate showdown was in the end anti-climactic. Now I am not a fanboy, I love what Marvel has done with their ‘Cinematic Universe’. But as a kid I always had a Batman or Superman comic in my hand. I watched reruns of Adam Wests “Batman” show as well as old episodes of the black & white “Adventures of Superman” starring George Reeves.

I wanted this film to be awesome and blow me away. I was anticipating this movie more than any other film in years. Which is why the dull story, weak persona of Jesse Eisenberg’s Lex Luthor, and a sulking Superman were a major disappointment.  BvS was decent at times and even enjoyable here and there, but the overall package is a fatiguing watch, when it definitely shouldn’t be.

poster-assassins-creed3. Assassin’s Creed

This is the newest film to make the list and the disappointment this one gave me is still very fresh. This was the film I hoped would break the curse of terrible video-game movies and all it did was slip itself in line with the rest. This was not a poorly crafted film, the budget is present, but the enjoyment of the story is severely lacking. The ‘Assassin’s Creed’ video games are something that should provide a wealth of movie material.

The problem is, the makers of this film do not look like they did anything more than read the cover sheets of the games, let alone actually play them because they missed the mark on what made them so enjoyable.The performances were okay but nothing close to carrying the slow, boring pace of the story, and the lack of action. “Assassin’s Creed” had the potential to be the best video-game film of all time and in the end, it wasn’t even the best video-game movie that came out this year.

poster-independence-day-22. Independence Day: Resurgence

Another reboot that tried to cash in on nostalgia while failing to deliver much in the form of entertainment. I can’t even count how many times I have seen “Independence Day” over the years. The performances from the cast as a whole were so charming and they made the most out of the material. Goldblum, Smith and Pullman were perfect in their roles, and the destruction was at the time, staggering to see in theaters.

“Independence Day” was not the sequel I had hoped for when I watched this film. It was nothing more than a generic young-adult novel film-adaption without the novel. The cast was bland, the dialogue was overly preachy, and not even the return of the always charismatic Jeff Goldblum could keep this movie from feeling like anything more than a name recognition cash-grab.

poster-ghostbusters1. Ghostbusters

This was the reboot that generated a lot of buzz before it was even released. “Ghostbusters” is an iconic franchise and the first film is an all-time classic. People had clamored for years for a sequel, but instead the keys were handed to Paul Feig. A reboot was proclaimed rather than a sequel, an all-female cast was filled and the internet went crazy.

I myself was intrigued by the female cast, they were all solid names in comedy, have all delivered some hilarious work in the careers, and despite the extremely cheesy trailers I was still in hopes there could be some fun in this movie. But in the end this was a film that while claiming the people who panned this movie prior to its release were sexist, filled its script with juvenile humor, cultural stereo-types, and reverse sexism.

What this film delivered was to the point of silent passive aggression, almost as if they actually were trying to mock the property they were at the same time trying to recoup their budget from. The one good thing this film did was knock “Ghostbusters 2” out of the spot for worst film in the franchise.


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